Moulton Lava

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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Planet Ayedee

An animation by Alisence ...

Title: Planet Ayedee
Series: Lunatic Drama: The Epic Misadventures of Barsoom Tork
Author: Alisence
Episode: Four

Episode 4: Planet Ayedee

Barsoom Tork: This is the Planet Ayedee, home of the Cabal. I'll beam down and try to find Tramp/B/.

[Beams down.]

Barsoom Tork: The smell of Anonymity is in the air. This must be the lair of the IDCabal.

WassaMattaHugh: Barsoom, I'm detecting life forms below your level. There might be a way down, but I could not risk a direct beaming.

Barsoom: The path is clear. I'm going in.

[Enters the Lair and finds multiple replicons of Tramp/B/.]

Barsoom: Tramp/B/, just how many of you are there in this Cabalistic Den of Lunatic Drama?

Tramp/B/: Just one. These are Tramp/C/, Tramp/D/, and Tramp/E/. They will replace me when I am caught violating the BLP Policy.

[Cheka arrives in response to Intruder Alert Signal.]

Tramp/B/: Take this Troll away. Block! Ban! Salt! Watch out for his tricks.

[Barsoom pinches Cheka's cojones.]

Cheka: Yeow!

Barsoom: That was a Martian Nerve Pinch. I think Tramp/B/ could use one, also.

[In a stunning maneuver, Tramp/B/ fires her phasors at Barsoom.]

Tramp/B/: You don't have to pummel him. He's unconscious.

[Scene shifts to Spammish Inquisition.]

Inquisitor: OK, Tork, you know why you are here.

Barsoom: The IDCabal has been adding false claims to Biographies of Living People.

Inquisitor: Hah hah hah hah. No. You are here to confess your WikiCrimes. First, I want you to say, "I am a Troll."

Barsoom: I don't even know who you are.

Inquisitor: I am Judge, Jury, Executioner. Now say, "I am a Troll."

Barsoom: Judge, you are a Troll.

[Cheka pummels Barsoom.]

Inquisitor: So, you want to do this the hard way, eh Tork?

Barsoom: I want to study why Wikipedia allows Sysops with Cluster B Personality Disorders to help the ID Cabal add false claims to Biographies.

[Inquisitor opens a Cluster B Candy Bar.]

Inquisitor: Yummy! Barsoom, it is time for you to try Cluster B.

Barsoom: High-sugar Cluster B and high-Dopamine Anonymity are a Toxic Combination that fuels Lunatic Drama.

Cheka: Try Cluster B, Barsoom. It is yummy.

Barsoom: The stench of Cluster B is making me nauseous.

[Beams away in the nick of time.]

Barsoom: Thanks for getting me out of there. I now know the secrets of the IDCabal.

WassaMattaHugh: Cluster B and Anonymity at a Wiki is deadly!


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