Moulton Lava

Moultonic Musings

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Location: New England, United States

Friday, March 18, 2011

Leader of the Pack

Title: Leader of the Smack
Artist: Lisa Rand and Twisted Sister
Composer: George "Shadow" Morton and Barsoom Tork Associates
YouTube: Leader of the Pack — Twisted Sister
Album: Bug Out and Pray

Hey, is he really phreakin' out again?
There he goes, let's ask him
Hey man, is that your sting, with swearin'?
Uh, huh
Man, it must be great ridin' that train
Are you pickin' up jerks at Meta to play?
Twisted Sister — Come Out and PlayUh uh
By the way where is Moulton?
I decked him on the Wiki floor
He turned around and yelled at me
You get the picture?
Yeah, I see
That's when I fell for

The leader of the smack

Good folks were always making me frown
They said he came from the wrong side of town
They told me that he was bad
But I knew he was sad
That's why I fell for

The leader of the smack

One day my Dad said find someone new
I had to tell him, "No more screw."
He stood there and asked me why
But all I could do was cry,
"I'm sorry I hurt you."

The leader of the smack

He was so enthralled
As I kissed him goodbye,
My tears were beginning to show
And as I drove away on that rainy night
He begged me to take it slow
If anyone cared, I'll never know
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

I felt so helpless what could I do?
Remembering all the crap he'd been through
All the Meta jerks stop and stare
I can't hide my tears but I don't care
They'll never respect him

The leader of the smack

Leader of the smack
And now I'm gone
Leader of the pack
And now I'm gone
Leader of the smack
And Moulton's gone
Leader of the pack
And Moulton's gone
Leader of the smack
And now I'm gone
Leader of the pack
And now I'm gone
Leader of the smack
And Moulton's gone
Leader of the pack
Sing Moulton's song
Leader of the smack
And now I'm gone
Leader of the pack
And Moulton's gone
Leader of the smack
Sing Moulton's song
Leader of the pack

CopyClef 2011 George "Shadow" Morton and Barsoom Tork Associates.
Resurrection Hackware. All wrongs reversed.

Leader of the Pack — Twisted Sister

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Minority Report

Jimmy Wong is my new hero.

He has a job with Barsoom Tork Associates.

Jimmy Wong sings a love letter to Alexandra Wallace

Post Script: Jimmy Wong is featured today (March 24th) on NPR's All Things Considered, in an interview with Melissa Block.

Sunday, March 06, 2011

Slime and Punishment

Ottavion Abdomovich Darkolnikov is a young ex-student of letters, law, and bloodlust living in extreme ennui in a dank basement in Darkansas. He lives in a tiny backwater where he rants, although due to a lack of fun has been avoiding learning for quite some time (he claims the gloom aggravates his repression). He acts like a grouch using old papers as a dildofap, and due to lack of motivation studies very rarely, although the neighbors sometimes send their sockpuppets into his quarters with food for thought. He is frequently referred to as a former student because he doesn't have the desire to finish his education. Spiritually, physically (due to lack of outdoor exercise) and emotionally distressed, his behaviour in public becomes progressively more erratic through the drama as madness gradually consumes him. Darkolnikov fluctuates between extremes of altruism and inexplicable antipathy. He is described by his acquaintances as "darkly pallid" and many other observers in the basement state that he is very intelligent, but tragically misguided.

In The Crime of the Ancient Mariner, Darkolnikov kiboshes an Albatross with a banhammer he keeps in the janitor's hall closet, with the intention of baleting its cries for good cause, based on a theory he had developed of the "bad actor" (often misunderstood as similar to the Übertroll of Kitsche [dubious – discuss]).

In one famous rant, Darkolnikov cries out, "Good Goat! Can it be, can it be, that I shall ritually take a toy banhammer, that I shall strike the Albatross on the block, split its skull asunder ... that I shall tread in the icky dark slum, break the peace, steal and tremble; hide, all spattered in the crud ... with the toy banhammer ... Good Goat, can it be?"

[Source: "The Scream of a Ridiculous Kid" by Fyodor Moultonevsky]

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Abd's Silly Pyschodrama Descends Into Farce

Moulton: Things have gotten uncharacteristically quiet of late. Perhaps people are taking some time off to think. Then again, I could just be engaging in a haphazard flight of fancy about that.

[Time passes.]

Moulton: Oh, that's interesting. A college drop-out who has spent his life engaged in Junk Science and Cargo-Cult Science just got blocked for impersonating a Nobel-Prize Winning Physicist who is one of the leading contributors to the Theory of Quantum Mechanics. Actually, it might have been amusing to see Abd have an imaginary conversation with his imaginary friend.

BlockHead: Moulton, maybe you and Abd should try a role reversal imaginary conversation.

Moulton: Actually, BlockHead, that is not far from what I had in mind in my Imaginary Dialogues (and other Silly Flights of Fancy) that I've penned as Atrocious Song Parodies. What I try to do in those exercises is to find a tiny parcel of common ground, a tiny glimpse of empathy for the other person's suffering. When you blocked him just now, I was saddened for both of you, because it was a baletocratic maneuver that, to my mind, went a skosh too far as a regulatory intervention. I would have done something a bit more democratic, to give Abd the opportunity of self-correction, rather than to assume he is incorrigible and in need of custodial restraints.

BlockHead: The psychodrama is rapidly descending into farce.

Moulton: Yes, psychodrama is a curious kind of farce, after you have witnessed it a few times. It took me decades before I could muster the fortitude to watch Edward Albee's famous psychodrama, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf, with Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor. And it was very uncomfortable to watch the first two times. But it's basically a farce, dressed up as a Scary Movie. Literally "Much Ado About Nothing," since "The Little Bugger" is an imaginary baby whom they made up out of whole cloth as a joint flight of fancy. They spend most of the play viciously blaming each other for the death of the imaginary baby they never really had.

BlockHead: What does "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf" have to do with Abd's silly psychodrama in Wikiversity?

Moulton: Here, the imaginary baby is the Epiphany that never happened. False Labor, as SB Johnny called it, when he was midwifing the pregnant goat who, in fact, did not have a kid inside her belly waiting to be born. It was False Labor, he said. And by some Mysterious Symmetry, BlockHead, the long-awaited Epiphany that Caprice was hoping to midwife was False Labor, too.

BlockHead: How disappointing.

Moulton: No Epiphany arrived. And so I am disappointed.

The Wisdom of Realistic Thinking

Acclaimed journalist, author and political activist Barbara Ehrenreich explores the darker side of positive thinking.

Barbara Ehrenreich — Smile or Die (RSA Animation)

Moulton and Abd Discuss Epistemological Methods

Moulton: Abd, do you have a method for testing your beliefs for accuracy?

Abd: Yes. I express them and observe how they are understood and analyzed by others. I listen to the responses, and check them for accuracy.

Moulton: I see. And how, pray tell, do you check the accuracy of information gleaned in the responses?

Abd: I keep them in mind and later repeat them and observe how they are understood and analyzed by others. I listen to the responses, and check them for accuracy.

Moulton: I see. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Abd: It works for me.

Moulton: In the last four months, you have submitted mountains of such material to me on my blog, on my Wikiversity talk page, and elsewhere in dozens of talk page discussions. What have you learned in all that time?

Abd: I'm not sufficiently interested in being "educated" by you, Moulton. Too much wasted time, already.

Moulton: In that case, I expect it would be more efficient for both of us if you did not submit to me mountains of your material to be reviewed, analyzed, or critiqued.

Abd: I did not ask you to review any of that material.

Moulton: True enough. I reviewed it for you out of the goodness of my heart. Still, I can't help but wonder where you are coming from.

Abd: My position is one of trust that there is an ultimate reality, not that I know it, nor even that I could comprehensively know it.

Moulton: But I'm perplexed as to why you chose me to submit your mountains of material to, given that you're not particularly interested in learning anything in the process.

Abd: Because you do not have the qualifications or credentials or competence.

Moulton: Then you are welcome to remain ignorant.

Abd: That's my plan.

Moulton: That works for me.

Abd: Never mind.